A Response to my 13 Year Old Self: More unposted drafts

 "Yesterday, I created a world for myself. It has always been there but I could not see it unless I changed my perspective. The world is different if only you look upside-down. Then it becomes my world. No one else is there because they are afraid to look ridiculous for the sake of social normality. It seems to me that most of our problems are those that we create ourselves. And to think, you still look ridiculous to me because you are the ones that are standing on the ceiling.

It is interesting to see all of the clocks so close to the floor"

I haven't done that since then. I should try it some time.

 

 

"My sea is made of stars."

Pretty.

"My brain is full of clouds."

You should see a doctor about that

"My heart is filled with love."

Incorrect, it's filled with blood

"My eyes see."

Yeah, I would hope so

"If you can open your eyes to my world you will see.
I look at my world snow and no one is here.
Where are you?
I need you,
but you cannot draw water from an empty well.
How do you expect to help others if you cannot help yourself."

Can you stop projecting inner turmoil for like 10 seconds?

"How can I love myself if they hate me because they hate themselves.
In a world where people hate even themselves how are we supposed to help the Earth.
The Earth loves us but out of the hate for ourselves we kill it."

It's not you, it's the corporations and billionaires. Failing to recycle a plastic bottle didn't set the ocean on fire, it's the greed of people so removed from the rest of the populace that they cannot fathom compassion anymore. Oh, forgot to tell you that, the ocean is on fire now. Happy 2021.

"I have longed to be someone special for so long but I am who I am.
I cannot change myself but I would die for a good cause."

You would have died for anything, you were depressed.

"I am thirteen. How old are you?"

Eighteen.

"It doesn't matter."

Wow, rude

"Whatever YOU can do to help the very ground WE stand on, whatever it takes,
it's WORTH IT."

I don't know how to help. The task seems hopeless and insurmountable sometimes, but I am still trying. I doubt motivation blog posts will fix systemic issues, but it was a good effort. Not to be a nihilist, I really do still hope that together we can make this better. You, me, and the world of people making a good effort.

"My mind works differently than yours.
It is ok that you don't understand.
But to me, instead of spending your life learning how to die, spend it learning how to LIVE."

Practice what you preach. From where I'm standing - well actually I'm sitting like a boiled shrimp in my office chair - you've still got a ways to go.

""Every time she closed her eyes, she dreamed of paradise" - Coldplay"

A Coldplay lyric. Classy. What a weird video. Do you think there was someone at a pitch meeting that was like "what imagery do you want for a song about sadness and escapism from the mundane?" "I was thinking maybe an elephant on a unicycle"

"Yesterday was the last day of one story and the beginning of a new one.
I learned so much, I laughed too hard, I failed, I passed, I failed better the next time.
There are no words that I can find to describe all of the pain, the happiness, the fun.
There were struggles that made me cry, but there were so many more times that gave me joy and hope and magical mammals (Inside Joke)."

I don't remember what the joke was. Wish I did. I don't remember all of these feelings either.

"There are so many different people on this planet. You will most likely never meet all of them. But the wonderful people that I have met these past two years are the most crazy gathering of nine people I have ever known."

Still true. I wonder what they're doing now?

"There was our teacher, who, up until yesterday, never realized how much she ordered us around. She also doesn't realize that we never cared that she told us to clean up, get packed, do this, do that. We loved her because we knew she was just being mother-ish. She wanted to prepare us for everything in the future. She gave us locks for lockers and wouldn't let us leave until we had unlocked them three times. She gave us latin roots, she taught us how to diagram a sentence, she showed us how the economy works, she gave us music, she gave us inspiration, and most of all, she gave us our little school."

...